It was a sunny Saturday morning in March. The weather was cool but the sun was flooding in through the windows. My husband had gotten up with our daughter so I could sleep in a little. Then we switched shifts. He went back to bed and I got up to play with her and get us ready for the day. I needed to hop in the shower so we could get going to baby yoga but while giving her a morning snack she cried at everything I offered and so I made a decision.
Today we were going to skip baby yoga.
I immediately felt guilty. Was I just being lazy and depriving my child of needed social interaction with peers? I mean we had missed yoga before but for actual reasons like being out of town or when she was sick. This was just laziness.
I text my sister for reassurance.
And then I text my best friend for further reassurance.
At this point it was too late anyway and I was stuck with my decision to skip.
Then it happened.
Well, nothing happened. By nothing I mean we just went about our Saturday without yoga class. Oddly enough we survived the day. We colored, we played outside. My in-laws came over for dinner. It was like my selfish decision didn’t affect anyone. All this guilt and anxiety I felt over this simple decision was for nothing. My daughter seemed just as happy playing at home than if we went to yoga class.
What is up with mom guilt?
Sometimes as a working mom I feel like I’m missing out on those weekday events stay-at-home moms get to do. I mean I’m sure it’s not always fun and games but I don’t get to go to play groups and weekday baby yoga or reading time at the library. To make up for it I sometimes end up trying to pack things into the weekend.
Now don’t get me wrong, I still love going to baby yoga. I love seeing her interact with the other kids and how she listens to the teacher. I like how she explores different body movements and learns new things. She goes to daycare every day and interacts with kids her age but I don’t get to witness it. I also enjoy seeing the other parents. Even if we don’t get to sit and socialize, it’s nice to see how other moms and dads interact with their children and how it doesn’t always go as planned. Not every child is in the mood every Saturday to do yoga or be social and that’s ok. Maybe a mom has to step out for a moment with her child or let them throw a little tantrum. We all get it and we all go on with class. We’ve all been there and we give our looks of empathy and know we’re all normal parents.
I’ll definitely be signing us up for another session but I’m working on not feeling as much guilt if I decide we need a break.